"No matter what happens in the kitchen, never apologize." - Julia Child

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Top Chef, Season 6, episode 4

TWO cheftestants gone in ONE episode? Mon dieu! Figures that they were two folks I actually liked. Mind you, I didn't think either one of them would make it to the finals (my money's on Kevin--go, chubby nerds!), but I was still sad to see them go, especially Hector. I liked seeing SOMEONE out there representing mi gente, ju know?

The episode was all about French food, a cuisine I actually don't know very much about, other than it includes lots of delicious butter. And wine of all kinds. Num. Any cuisine that likes that much butter and wine is okay by me. I thought that the challenge of pairing a sauce-making contestant with an entree-making contestant was a clever way to pair off the chefs.

But let's back up a second: eliminating someone after a quickfire challenge? Craaa-zy! They haven't done that before, and I'm not sure how I feel about the tactic. Although I guess if you can't make a stellar dish in such a brief period of time, maybe you shouldn't be there. And Jesse had been on the bottom of nearly every challenge since the series began, so maybe it was time for her to go. She seemed like her heart wasn't really into it. I did like her, though, especially because she seemed to like using eggs, even though every time Jeremy saw her he said, "Take that fucking shit out of your face!"

And let's talk about the fact that THE FRENCHMAN was in the bottom! Oh my lordy, you are FRENCH. You grew up eating and making this stuff. And you fucked up a challenge cooking FRENCH FOOD. Because of too much BACON! Now I am usually of the opinion that there is no such thing as too much bacon, but clearly the pros disagreed with me. But then again, I don't really know very much about French food, regrettably, other than the butter and wine thing. And also eating creatures like frogs and snails. (Although I think things in shells are generally pretty yummy.)

But Matin was spared, and instead Hector went home, for his poorly cooked meat. Poor boricua couldn't get a break. First the judges harshed on his realm because they had no idea that Latinos fry everything, including steaks. And now they're like, boo, you can't cook a steak. Alas. I do admire the fact that he's representing by wearing a guayabera in his exit photo. But seriously---Top Chef needs some more diversity. Now it's just a bunch of white folks, who all slightly resemble each other, and one large, jovial Haitian man. Why aren't there more Latinos? Why are there hardly ever Asians on this show? WTF?

And seriously, WTF are ramps? Ramps? Why was everyone making food with ramps? Aren't those the things that people use to roll wheeled things up and down into buildings and buses? What do ramps have to do with food? Ramps are, apparently, a wild onion, like a stronger-flavored leek.  Thank you, Top Chef, for teaching me new things! (Or at least for forcing me to go on the interwebs to learn new things.)

Hector, I salute you! Never doubt yourself in the future when you deep-fry a steak! Never!


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